QUICK FANG: Triumph Rocket III Touring - Heavy Reign
I’m on a bike with the world’s biggest production motorcycle engine, in the ‘storm of a century’, and I’m bored. This is not how I thought my day would go.
When I arrived to pick up the Rocket III Touring, priced from $26,490 (plus on-road costs), I was giddy with expectation. Not only would I be riding the production bike that’s been pumping more torque (203Nm) than almost any other for 14 years, but I’d also be doing it in an ‘unprecedented’ deluge, with severe thunderstorm and flood warnings for Victoria.
“Be careful. No traction control and no complicated electronics. Just brute force,” one of the Triumph boys said before I left.
Yep, I was in for some fun.
Eagerly, I rolled out, muscling the 358kg behemoth on to the motorway. The road was clear and I was pumped. I gave the throttle a hard twist, half expecting the heavens to open in more ways than one. And do you know what happened?
Not much.
Instead of rocketing, the engine groaned and hauled like an old V8 – fast and strong but not mind-blowingly quick. And that wasn’t all. The overall feel was disappointing too. Compared with some of the newer big cruisers, it felt slightly unruly, possibly because of its conventional-width tyres (180 rear and 150 front), which improve its manoeuvrability but balance a lot of weight, much of it up high in its 22.3-litre fuel tank.
Where was the Rocket I’d heard so much about? Come to think of it – where was the storm of a century the weatherman had predicted?
I pondered these questions during the long, drizzly commute home and came to a sobering realisation: my disappointment was not the bike’s fault, or the weather’s. It was mine.
My expectations were simply too high.
When the Rocket III was launched in 2004, it blew the competition away. Bigger was better and nothing compared – not the 1449cc Harley-Davidson Twin Cam 88, the 1795cc Honda VTX1800 or even the 2053cc Kawasaki Vulcan.
But it’s almost 2020 now, and the game has changed. These days we have H-D and Indian Motorcycle (and Triumph in its newer models) making smaller but more intelligent, refined engines. The result is often performance that feels punchier and more useable – even in something like Harley’s 376kg (wet) Street Glide, which offers a comparatively puny 150Nm.
We’re spoilt. So of course a scarcely updated 14-year-old engine feels dated. And of course I was set for disappointment when I believed the spiel on Triumph’s website: “Believe the unbelievable.”
Likewise, I shouldn’t have been disappointed by the ‘weather event’. Because, while I probably could have left my clothes on the line, there were people in the state who were evacuated, and for whom the extreme weather was very real. It’s all about context.
So, with that in mind, I spent a couple more weeks on the Rocket, trying to remember that it’s a relatively old bike but was a legend in its day. And guess what. It grew on me.
Yes, a family of four could play Scrabble on the fuel tank and, yes, the radiator could be the back of a bar fridge. But once you appreciate it for what it is – an honest, big bastard from the early 2000s – it’s a blast, especially when that rear wheel unexpectedly breaks traction off the lights (90% of its torque is available at just over 2000rpm).
The finish is first-rate, the upright ergonomics are comfortable, the fuelling is respectable, and the cornering clearance is surprisingly decent. Then there are the KYB suspension and brakes with ABS (Nissin front and Brembo rear), which handle the 358kg dry weight comfortably and confidently. And how can you not gush over those three iconic headers?
By the time I had to give the Rocket III back, I was imagining one permanently sitting in my shed – but not because it has the biggest engine or produces the most torque. Strangely, what I now like about the Rocket is what initially put me off. The rawness and simplicity of the engine. Its sheer size and presence on the road. Even its weight be-comes a hoot to handle when you get used to it.
Yep, it’s still a formidable bike – just don’t expect to be blown away in the first 10 minutes, by the weather or otherwise.
